Everyone always says "where did this year go" but for the first time in my life... I know what everyone is talking about. WHERE THE HELL DID 2009 GO? I still remember the year as if it was yesterday. 2009 was a year of firsts for me. First love, first heartbreak, first breakup, first time i've felt like myself, first time facing my fears and past head on, and just first time finally being and expressing JOSHUA for who he is. It has been a year alright!
As many of you know in 2009 I came out to my family which was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Not because I thought they wouldn't accept me for who I was.. but just because coming out is a whole challenge in itself. With a strong support team behind me, I was able to tackle not only coming out in 2009, but a lot of my other fears and failures. I was able for the first time in YEARS to cut someone out of my life that was having a negative impact on me as an individual. You never really know how much someone from your past can have an impact on you until something life changing either happens to you, or them. It wasn't until months later did I realize how much of an impact this person was having on my life. Because of them I found it hard to trust, hard to love, hard to be me. Our relationship that we had years ago, was still haunting me. I did what I had to do in order to move on and have some kind of closure. And hey.. it worked.
One thing I learned this year was the power of friendship. Sometimes when your life is so consumed by others.. you tend to lose sight of what's really important. Friendship and family. Going through a roller coaster of emotions this year.. from beginning to end.. one person who I could always count on is my mom. Believe it or not.. at the age of 23... I cried to my mom more times than I have EVER cried to anyone. hahaha. Say what you want, but the love a mother shares with her son, that bond.. that bond is one of the strongest. ESPECIALLY when her son is gay and tells her those black satin pumps DEFINITELY do not match that sequence top. ;) (what was she thinking?!?!) but no seriously.. I lost count the amount of times this year I'd come home fight with my mother about the stupidest thing, lock myself in my room, and come crying to her minutes later realizing I was wrong.. and realizing I had no one to turn to except for her. Without a question, she would come running to my rescue to hold me, to comfort me, to console me. To be my mom.
As individuals we try and be the strongest we possibly can in front of others. But the truth is.. we all have a weak side, we all have a moment we let our guard down. We all have THAT moment when we find ourself alone, and really just need someone there with us. We've all had them at one point or another. God at this point in our life usually sends us an angel in disguise. This "angel" can be someone, something, a pet, a person, a symbol showing us he is there. I can't even begin to describe the amount of angels that have picked me up this year when I thought I was at my lowest of lows. From family and friends to pets and emails. The number of angels around all of us are uncountable!
So at the end of 2009, I look back and reflect as to what God, the angels, my family and friends... what they have given me. They have given me new hope, new dreams, and new aspirations for 2010. The other day I received this email that I'd like to share with you.. instead of focusing on the negative in our lives we must try and think of the positive that can come from it. Sometimes life doesn't always give you the lemons you've been hoping for but there are always worse out there than us. For they would only pray to have the problems we have: Today before you say an unkind word - Think of someone who can't speak. Before you complain about the taste of your food - Think of someone who has nothing to eat. Before you complain about your husband or wife - Think of someone who's crying out to GOD for a companion. Today before you complain about life - Think of someone who went too early to heaven. Before whining about the distance you drive Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet. And when you are tired and complain about your job - Think of the unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your job. And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down - Put a smile on your face and think: you're alive and still around.
Tomorrow as I watch the ball drop, from the same spot I did last year... surrounded by the same people (more than likely) I'll stand there alone and be thankful for all the people who have helped me through 2009. I'll circle the room and see all the smiling and happy faces hug and kiss and toast the free champagne (unless you lost your red ticket!) and just sit back and enjoy the moment for what it is. As 2009 ends, I challenge all of you to tell someone from 2009 how much of an impact they have made in your life this year. Find that special someone who may not know how much they mean to you.. and find a way to share and tell them before the year is over. I did it today, you can too. I challenge you. Think of someone other than yourself. Think of the impact your actions have made on others, and look back in your own life and see who has made the biggest impact on YOU this past year. Don't be afraid of the response you might get... Just tell them. If anything, it's a form of flattery! So hats off to you 2009, you've been an intense year of emotions. Happy, sad, positive and negative. You've been a year of love, hate, happiness and heartbreak. You've been a year filled with new beginnings, new life, weddings, births, deaths and romances. You've been a year filled with pride and sorrow, new friends and old friends. A year where old friends became new friends again, and a year where friendships may have dissolved. But most of all you've been another year in all of our hats. If we could get through 2009 just fine, then 2010 should hopefully be just as easy.
Happy New Years everybody. May god bless. and I pray that your 2010.. goes a little smoother than 2009.
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Saturday, December 5, 2009
The First Snow
Living in New England, I think it's funny every time someone gets angry about the first snow. It's true.. you live in New England, you probably have your whole life... so why do people continue to get angry about the first time it snows? It's actually kind of funny. But on a deeper level, the first snow means a whole lot more. I guess it all depends on how you choose to look at it.
In life we make choices everyday. Every choice we make leads us down a new path, much like those choose your own adventure books. Today was... interesting to say the least. The past few weeks, every time something seems to be going right in life, something/someone comes a long and throws a nice little kink into the mix. I look back and try and figure out what choice I made in order for me to get to this point. But sometimes you can look back as much as you want, and try and find the root of your issue, but it is so deeply planted, and so complex. It is never ONE choice that leads you to where you are, it a series of events that I believe are pre-determined for us by a higher power. Which brings me to the subject of the first snow of the season.
The first snow usually falls late November, early December. Before the first snow of the season falls the weather is usually pretty ugly outside. Leaves everywhere, muddy, dark, cold nights... frost on the windows, Darker outside earlier... just all around gloomy. As the first snow falls it covers what is already outside. It covers the ground, trees, etc. in a fresh coat of white. White being the purest of all colors, representing a fresh start, a blank canvas, a second start. There is nothing to judge off of, just what you see. (nothing) There is something to be said for second chances in life. We have all been given a second chance, we have all wanted a second chance...
The snow is a second chance for the fall/winter. It gives the season a fresh start. Just when we all start to hate winter, we somehow get into the holiday spirit and the season of winter during the first snow fall. It makes us all pure again, brings us back to our childhood memories of snow days off from school, outside with our siblings and friends making snow angels and snowmen.. running inside and warming up by the fireplace with a cup of hot chocolate. But eventually we are faced with reality. The days of our childhood begin to fade, the same way the first snow begins to melt. The ugly that lies beneath is still there... and is now grey and dirty.
Once the snow begins to melt, we see what was already there beforehand. EXACTLY what was there to begin with, just being covered by something else. We can try and be someone else, we can try and fake it, we can put on a costume, a uniform, a fake persona. You may fall in love what was covered by the snow... but as the snow begins to melt, do you still love what ever it is that you were infatuated with to begin with? The answer should be yes. The true love lies on the inside. the ugly. Once you get past the outside (the fresh snow) do you love what's on the inside (beneath the snow)? Only once you look at yourself and love what's on the inside can you look at others and look at them for what is past the snow. past the physical features, look at them for who they are, what they do for others, how much support they have shown you, how REAL they are... if you can't love what is beneath your own layer of snow, there is no way you can love anyone else.
Only recently have I begun to love the dirty, muddy insides of myself. looking past what is on the outside, past the clothing, the career, past everything that is physical and tangible. Being put through an emotional ringer, (the snow plow of life) I can now see the inside. and I love what I see, and who I am.
Can you see it?
You can't blame a person for who they are. At times in life we have all done things that make us less than perfect, and not proud. But the strongest moments in life are when we are able to admit to others our own faults and flaws. I am not afraid to say I know what my flaws are. Trust being one of the major ones. Trusting someone in my life is hard to do... I have trusted very few people in my life, and one of the first people I trusted with my deepest darkest secrets found a way to play their emotions into my pain, and make the issues at hand about them, and filling their own voids without giving a care in the world to mine. Now, years later I am finally looking past "the first snow fall" and beginning to trust others again. If I can do it, you can do it too. Don't let anyone ever downplay your emotions or make you feel like one of your problems isn't important. If they are a true friend, no matter what the issue is.. they will care. If the issue is important enough for you to care about, they should too. I hate to end this on a lady gaga quote but hey.. I'm going to: recently, in an interview on ellen she said "Sometimes in life you don't always feel like a winner, but that doesn't mean that you're not a winner.."
Take time today, make your own blizzard. make your own fresh start on life. you might be surprised at what you learn about yourself. To close this out, I choose to end it with a song. Sometimes in the midst of a snow storm in life I wish I could fly away, like the birds fly south for winter. Sometimes we all wish we could get up from our problems and just fly away. Get away from here, see where else life will take us. But it's not that easy. We can't just get up and leave. Our problems will still be there when we get back.
Lyrics: Annie Lennox - Little Bird Lyrics
In life we make choices everyday. Every choice we make leads us down a new path, much like those choose your own adventure books. Today was... interesting to say the least. The past few weeks, every time something seems to be going right in life, something/someone comes a long and throws a nice little kink into the mix. I look back and try and figure out what choice I made in order for me to get to this point. But sometimes you can look back as much as you want, and try and find the root of your issue, but it is so deeply planted, and so complex. It is never ONE choice that leads you to where you are, it a series of events that I believe are pre-determined for us by a higher power. Which brings me to the subject of the first snow of the season.
The first snow usually falls late November, early December. Before the first snow of the season falls the weather is usually pretty ugly outside. Leaves everywhere, muddy, dark, cold nights... frost on the windows, Darker outside earlier... just all around gloomy. As the first snow falls it covers what is already outside. It covers the ground, trees, etc. in a fresh coat of white. White being the purest of all colors, representing a fresh start, a blank canvas, a second start. There is nothing to judge off of, just what you see. (nothing) There is something to be said for second chances in life. We have all been given a second chance, we have all wanted a second chance...
The snow is a second chance for the fall/winter. It gives the season a fresh start. Just when we all start to hate winter, we somehow get into the holiday spirit and the season of winter during the first snow fall. It makes us all pure again, brings us back to our childhood memories of snow days off from school, outside with our siblings and friends making snow angels and snowmen.. running inside and warming up by the fireplace with a cup of hot chocolate. But eventually we are faced with reality. The days of our childhood begin to fade, the same way the first snow begins to melt. The ugly that lies beneath is still there... and is now grey and dirty.
Once the snow begins to melt, we see what was already there beforehand. EXACTLY what was there to begin with, just being covered by something else. We can try and be someone else, we can try and fake it, we can put on a costume, a uniform, a fake persona. You may fall in love what was covered by the snow... but as the snow begins to melt, do you still love what ever it is that you were infatuated with to begin with? The answer should be yes. The true love lies on the inside. the ugly. Once you get past the outside (the fresh snow) do you love what's on the inside (beneath the snow)? Only once you look at yourself and love what's on the inside can you look at others and look at them for what is past the snow. past the physical features, look at them for who they are, what they do for others, how much support they have shown you, how REAL they are... if you can't love what is beneath your own layer of snow, there is no way you can love anyone else.
Only recently have I begun to love the dirty, muddy insides of myself. looking past what is on the outside, past the clothing, the career, past everything that is physical and tangible. Being put through an emotional ringer, (the snow plow of life) I can now see the inside. and I love what I see, and who I am.
Can you see it?
You can't blame a person for who they are. At times in life we have all done things that make us less than perfect, and not proud. But the strongest moments in life are when we are able to admit to others our own faults and flaws. I am not afraid to say I know what my flaws are. Trust being one of the major ones. Trusting someone in my life is hard to do... I have trusted very few people in my life, and one of the first people I trusted with my deepest darkest secrets found a way to play their emotions into my pain, and make the issues at hand about them, and filling their own voids without giving a care in the world to mine. Now, years later I am finally looking past "the first snow fall" and beginning to trust others again. If I can do it, you can do it too. Don't let anyone ever downplay your emotions or make you feel like one of your problems isn't important. If they are a true friend, no matter what the issue is.. they will care. If the issue is important enough for you to care about, they should too. I hate to end this on a lady gaga quote but hey.. I'm going to: recently, in an interview on ellen she said "Sometimes in life you don't always feel like a winner, but that doesn't mean that you're not a winner.."
Take time today, make your own blizzard. make your own fresh start on life. you might be surprised at what you learn about yourself. To close this out, I choose to end it with a song. Sometimes in the midst of a snow storm in life I wish I could fly away, like the birds fly south for winter. Sometimes we all wish we could get up from our problems and just fly away. Get away from here, see where else life will take us. But it's not that easy. We can't just get up and leave. Our problems will still be there when we get back.
Lyrics: Annie Lennox - Little Bird Lyrics
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Paying it forward
A lot of times we do things without second guessing ourselves. We just DO IT. Later on we may look back on what we just did and either regret it, think we were CRAZY for doing something, or just.. be glad we did it. I can't begin to describe the amount of times I just do things without thinking.. but in a positive aspect. Since I started this blog I hoped it would be a way for people to see joshua in a different light. Maybe you only know me as the shotboy at the bar, or as your co-worker, or as a loving member of your family... But there are many different layers and sides to me, to all of us. This blog is a way to share those sides to not let you just know "Joshua the shotboy" or "Joshua the marketing assistant" but JOSHUA.. for who he is. Granted my life is so complex and hard to understand at times even for myself... and I can probably name the 2-3 people in my life that pretty much know EVERYTHING about me, but I choose to write here, to share, with you.. who I am.
Now that the holidays are approaching I usually find reasons to do good for others around me... not always in hope that someone one day will do the same for me, but out of the goodness of my heart. The self gratitude I get out of helping others at times, puts me in positive spirits the same way I may of just made this persons day. This past month while in line at dunkin donuts.. getting my usual tea.. (Great one, 2 bags, dark, skim milk, 4 sugars) There was a group of old ladies in front of me... about 6-7 of them.. deciding on what they should get. They were dressed in their sunday bests on a tuesday at 7:30am and debating between the usual bran muffin, of if they wanted to try the pumpkin... after recommending to them if they wanted a REAL pumpkin muffin to go to starbucks or panera because the ones at dunkin just aren't the same... they suggested that I go ahead of them.. "You look very important, we don't want you to be late for work... we're just ladies of leisure today, we come out once a month and do this together as friends" I said thank you, and went first... As I placed my order, I turned to me right and they all just seemed so happy... I wish when I get to that age in life that i too can be that happy, that I can have a group of friends to go out with and make smile like that someday. I wanted to do something nice for these old ladies. As the girl behind the counter rang up their order it came to $22 and change. My order was under $3. Before the ladies could even pull any money out of their purses I told the girl.. add it to mine. These ladies you would think won the lottery.. I was instantly taken into their arms.. hugged, kissed, praised.. sure it felt good to do a good thing for them.. but the faces they made and the gratitude they showed made it all worth it.
This may just be one example of how I've been able to touch others lives, but we ALL can make a difference in someone else's life without even knowing it. At any given time in life you never know who could be thinking of you, praying for you, wishing, dreaming, and hoping for you. Walking through the streets of providence for school/work/fun/etc.. there was always an abundance of homeless people around and every one was always begging for money, some for booze yes, but others for food, clothing, LIFE. I remember someone telling me that a homeless man came up to them and asked them for money one day for beer, and instead of giving the homeless man a dollar or 2, he invited him in to a local bar, bought him a beer, sat with him.. and heard his story. Another one of my friends was in boston one day, and a homeless lady asked how he was.. and he asked her how she was.. her response: Every day is getting better. She didn't beg, she didn't ask, she just.. was living her life to the best she can, and knew one day things would change for her.. she had such a positive outlook on life he invited her out for coffee.
Sometimes these little deeds in life can be costly, but other times.. they can cost you NOTHING. I remember one time in college cleaning out my closet of old clothes/coats/etc.. and driving home one day from work and making a little detour to where I knew a group of homeless men lived. Instead of donating the clothing to the salvation army I stopped by their tent behind the old mall and asked them if they were cold, naturally being the dead of winter they said yes. I said it's not much, but I have some extra coats and sweaters I was getting rid of, please.. take them. They were so grateful... while standing there.. you couldn't help but notice how famished and sickly they looked.. I felt like I had to do SOMETHING else... I told them I would be right back, I had something else for them. I ran to McDonalds.. picked up a bag of cheeseburgers.. ( I think there was 10 burgers in total) returned to them, gave them the burgers and was headed home. One of the guys said he hasn't had McDonalds since his wife was in the hospital. He naturally started to share his story. Months prior he was in the hospital with his wife who was deathly ill.. he had to spend day and night with her. Eventually she got so sick she passed away. H then got laid off from his job and just couldn't make ends meet and before he knew it, he was homeless.
But to get back on track of "Paying it Forward" please take time, open your eyes.. realize what you have around you. Cherish it. Help that person in need, help them the way you would like to be helped one day. Do for them what is right, what is just, and what needs to be done. Because at the end of the day we are all human, we all deserve to be treated like humans. A great story I was once told about paying it forward is about a little girl who was sitting in her third grade classroom. Her name was Susie.
Picture this... third grade classroom..... There is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and all of a sudden, there is a puddle between his feet and the front of his pants are wet. He thinks his heart is going to stop because he cannot possibly imagine how this has happened. It's never happened before, and he knows that when the boys find out he will never hear the end of it. When the girls find out, they'll never speak to him again as long as he lives. The boy believes his heart is going to stop; he puts his head down and prays this prayer, 'Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now! Five minutes from now I'm dead meat.' He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher with a look in her eyes that says he has been discovered. As the teacher is walking toward him, a class mate named Susie is carrying a goldfish bowl that is filled with water. Susie trips in front of the teacher and inexplicably dumps the bowl of water in the boy's lap. The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is saying to himself, 'Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!' Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object of ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy. The teacher rushes him downstairs and gives him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out. All the other children are on their hands and knees cleaning up around his desk. The sympathy is wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule that should have been his has been transferred to someone else - Susie. She tries to help, but they tell her to get out. You've done enough, you klutz!' Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for the bus, the boy walks over to Susie and whispers, 'You did that on purpose, didn't you?' Susie whispers back, 'I wet my pants once too.'
Although the story of Susie may seem a little off topic, think about it. It all has to do with karma, and doing what you would want others to do to you. We have all been in that little boys place at one point in our life.. wishing, hoping, praying that someone like Susie was around to take the blame and embarrassment off of us. (for once) And we can one day end up like the man who lost his wife and job and ended up homeless, and praying for a warm jacket or a burger. One night we could all be rushed to the hospital hoping for a friend to be by our side to help us if needed. To be our support system. We can't go through life alone. There is no way we can survive.
Take time this holiday season, reflect on the people who may have been there for you in your darkest hours. Think about what they might of done for you to pay it forward. Think about the Susie in your life, that person who took the embarrassment off of you for a change. I have never felt so blessed as I have this past year between my friends and family. I'd like to thank you all for what you have done for ME. And i promise you this.. I will be your Susie, I will be your friend, I will be your enemy, but I will always care for you, I will always do what is right, I will always do what I WANT DONE FOR ME. I will always treat you like a human, I will always love you like a human, I will give you the respect you deserve. It's like they say.. what goes around comes around. I might need you to help me with a project for a change, I might need you to stay up all night and help me study/plan for a big test tomorrow, I might get into a car accident and need you to give me rides around town, I might need you there for me one day in the ER till the early hours of the morning, I might need you as a shoulder to cry on, I might need you to give me a meal in my poorest of days.. but most of all I need you. My friends and family I rely on you to get me through this crazy world. You may come into this world alone, and you may leave alone... but that doesn't mean you need to spend your days here on earth alone. Take time out of your day for others. Make time. You must in order to survive. And please, don't just make time for me, make time for those less fortunate than us, those who are struggling and dying and those who have to live every day going with out. One day it will all come back to you and be worth it. Karma may be a bitch.. but she is one FIERCE bitch. =)
So thank you.
MA, KH, CB, SM, DD, DM, MW, AN, SN, MN... all of you. thanks.
Now that the holidays are approaching I usually find reasons to do good for others around me... not always in hope that someone one day will do the same for me, but out of the goodness of my heart. The self gratitude I get out of helping others at times, puts me in positive spirits the same way I may of just made this persons day. This past month while in line at dunkin donuts.. getting my usual tea.. (Great one, 2 bags, dark, skim milk, 4 sugars) There was a group of old ladies in front of me... about 6-7 of them.. deciding on what they should get. They were dressed in their sunday bests on a tuesday at 7:30am and debating between the usual bran muffin, of if they wanted to try the pumpkin... after recommending to them if they wanted a REAL pumpkin muffin to go to starbucks or panera because the ones at dunkin just aren't the same... they suggested that I go ahead of them.. "You look very important, we don't want you to be late for work... we're just ladies of leisure today, we come out once a month and do this together as friends" I said thank you, and went first... As I placed my order, I turned to me right and they all just seemed so happy... I wish when I get to that age in life that i too can be that happy, that I can have a group of friends to go out with and make smile like that someday. I wanted to do something nice for these old ladies. As the girl behind the counter rang up their order it came to $22 and change. My order was under $3. Before the ladies could even pull any money out of their purses I told the girl.. add it to mine. These ladies you would think won the lottery.. I was instantly taken into their arms.. hugged, kissed, praised.. sure it felt good to do a good thing for them.. but the faces they made and the gratitude they showed made it all worth it.
This may just be one example of how I've been able to touch others lives, but we ALL can make a difference in someone else's life without even knowing it. At any given time in life you never know who could be thinking of you, praying for you, wishing, dreaming, and hoping for you. Walking through the streets of providence for school/work/fun/etc.. there was always an abundance of homeless people around and every one was always begging for money, some for booze yes, but others for food, clothing, LIFE. I remember someone telling me that a homeless man came up to them and asked them for money one day for beer, and instead of giving the homeless man a dollar or 2, he invited him in to a local bar, bought him a beer, sat with him.. and heard his story. Another one of my friends was in boston one day, and a homeless lady asked how he was.. and he asked her how she was.. her response: Every day is getting better. She didn't beg, she didn't ask, she just.. was living her life to the best she can, and knew one day things would change for her.. she had such a positive outlook on life he invited her out for coffee.
Sometimes these little deeds in life can be costly, but other times.. they can cost you NOTHING. I remember one time in college cleaning out my closet of old clothes/coats/etc.. and driving home one day from work and making a little detour to where I knew a group of homeless men lived. Instead of donating the clothing to the salvation army I stopped by their tent behind the old mall and asked them if they were cold, naturally being the dead of winter they said yes. I said it's not much, but I have some extra coats and sweaters I was getting rid of, please.. take them. They were so grateful... while standing there.. you couldn't help but notice how famished and sickly they looked.. I felt like I had to do SOMETHING else... I told them I would be right back, I had something else for them. I ran to McDonalds.. picked up a bag of cheeseburgers.. ( I think there was 10 burgers in total) returned to them, gave them the burgers and was headed home. One of the guys said he hasn't had McDonalds since his wife was in the hospital. He naturally started to share his story. Months prior he was in the hospital with his wife who was deathly ill.. he had to spend day and night with her. Eventually she got so sick she passed away. H then got laid off from his job and just couldn't make ends meet and before he knew it, he was homeless.
But to get back on track of "Paying it Forward" please take time, open your eyes.. realize what you have around you. Cherish it. Help that person in need, help them the way you would like to be helped one day. Do for them what is right, what is just, and what needs to be done. Because at the end of the day we are all human, we all deserve to be treated like humans. A great story I was once told about paying it forward is about a little girl who was sitting in her third grade classroom. Her name was Susie.
Picture this... third grade classroom..... There is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and all of a sudden, there is a puddle between his feet and the front of his pants are wet. He thinks his heart is going to stop because he cannot possibly imagine how this has happened. It's never happened before, and he knows that when the boys find out he will never hear the end of it. When the girls find out, they'll never speak to him again as long as he lives. The boy believes his heart is going to stop; he puts his head down and prays this prayer, 'Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now! Five minutes from now I'm dead meat.' He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher with a look in her eyes that says he has been discovered. As the teacher is walking toward him, a class mate named Susie is carrying a goldfish bowl that is filled with water. Susie trips in front of the teacher and inexplicably dumps the bowl of water in the boy's lap. The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is saying to himself, 'Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!' Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object of ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy. The teacher rushes him downstairs and gives him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out. All the other children are on their hands and knees cleaning up around his desk. The sympathy is wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule that should have been his has been transferred to someone else - Susie. She tries to help, but they tell her to get out. You've done enough, you klutz!' Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for the bus, the boy walks over to Susie and whispers, 'You did that on purpose, didn't you?' Susie whispers back, 'I wet my pants once too.'
Although the story of Susie may seem a little off topic, think about it. It all has to do with karma, and doing what you would want others to do to you. We have all been in that little boys place at one point in our life.. wishing, hoping, praying that someone like Susie was around to take the blame and embarrassment off of us. (for once) And we can one day end up like the man who lost his wife and job and ended up homeless, and praying for a warm jacket or a burger. One night we could all be rushed to the hospital hoping for a friend to be by our side to help us if needed. To be our support system. We can't go through life alone. There is no way we can survive.
Take time this holiday season, reflect on the people who may have been there for you in your darkest hours. Think about what they might of done for you to pay it forward. Think about the Susie in your life, that person who took the embarrassment off of you for a change. I have never felt so blessed as I have this past year between my friends and family. I'd like to thank you all for what you have done for ME. And i promise you this.. I will be your Susie, I will be your friend, I will be your enemy, but I will always care for you, I will always do what is right, I will always do what I WANT DONE FOR ME. I will always treat you like a human, I will always love you like a human, I will give you the respect you deserve. It's like they say.. what goes around comes around. I might need you to help me with a project for a change, I might need you to stay up all night and help me study/plan for a big test tomorrow, I might get into a car accident and need you to give me rides around town, I might need you there for me one day in the ER till the early hours of the morning, I might need you as a shoulder to cry on, I might need you to give me a meal in my poorest of days.. but most of all I need you. My friends and family I rely on you to get me through this crazy world. You may come into this world alone, and you may leave alone... but that doesn't mean you need to spend your days here on earth alone. Take time out of your day for others. Make time. You must in order to survive. And please, don't just make time for me, make time for those less fortunate than us, those who are struggling and dying and those who have to live every day going with out. One day it will all come back to you and be worth it. Karma may be a bitch.. but she is one FIERCE bitch. =)
So thank you.
MA, KH, CB, SM, DD, DM, MW, AN, SN, MN... all of you. thanks.
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